Brace yourself for the fruits of my preparation

I love the language newspapers use during the transfer window silly season.

Teams that don't want to sell a player are always "bracing themselves", or "preparing for a bid" for their man.

In what way are they "bracing themselves"? Are they all stood nervously around the fax machine biting their nails down to the cuticles?

At the same time, buying clubs are "getting ready to launch a bid".

How exactly? Do they scribble it on a bit of paper, screw it up then drop it into a readily positioned cannon and fire it at the other clubs window?

Doesn't the Chairman of one club just phone the other up and ask him if the player is for sale? Or maybe he sends them an e-mail? How much preparation does it take to e-mail "I'll give you £20 million for so and so"? You probably couldn't get both of the So twins for £20 million anyway but I was just making a point.

(There aren't really twin footballers who go by the name of So, at least I don't think there is, and if there is, it is purely co-incidental)